How to writing well_2

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How to writing well_2 66 PART ONE - THE BASICS OF THE SHORT ESSAY ✍ APPLYING WHAT YOU’VE LEARNED TO Y OUR WRITING If you are currently drafting an essay, look closely at your body paragraphs. Find the topic sentence in each paragraph and circle the key words that most clearly communicate the main idea of the paragraph. Then ask yourself if the information in each paragraph effectively supports, explains, or illustrates the main idea of the paragraph’s topic sentence. Is there enough information? If you’re not sure, try numbering your supporting details. Are there too few to be persuasive? Does the paragraph present clear, specific supporting material or does it contain too many vague generalities to be convincing? Where could you add more details to help the reader understand your ideas better and to make each paragraph more interesting? ( For more help revising your para- graphs, see Chapter 5.) PARAGRAPH UNITY Every sentence in a body paragraph should relate directly to the main idea presented by the topic sentence. A paragraph must stick to its announced sub- ject; it must not drift away into another discussion. In other words, a good paragraph has unity. Examine the unified paragraph below; note that the topic sentence clearly states the paragraph’s main point and that each sentence thereafter supports the topic sentence. (1) Frank Lloyd Wright, America’s leading architect of the first half of the twentieth century, believed that his houses should blend naturally with their building sites. ( 2) Consequently, he designed several “prairie houses,” whose long, low lines echoed the flat earth plan. ( 3) Built of brick, stone, and natural wood, the houses shared a similar texture with their backgrounds. (4) Large windows were often used to blend the interior and exterior of the houses. ( 5) Wright also punctuated the lines and spaces of the houses with greenery in planters to further make the buildings look like part of nature. The first sentence states the main idea, that Wright thought houses should blend with their location, and the other sentences support this assertion: Topic sentence: Wright’s houses blend with their natural locations ( 2 ) long, low lines echo flat prairie ( 3 ) brick, stone, wood provide same texture as location (4 ) windows blend inside with outside ( 5 ) greenery in planters imitates the natural surroundings 67 CHAPTER 3 - THE BODY PARAGRAPHS Now look at the next paragraph, in which the writer strays from his origi- nal purpose: (1) Cigarette smoke is unhealthy even for people who don’t have the nicotine habit themselves. ( 2) Secondhand smoke can cause asthmatics and sufferers of sinusitis seri- ous problems. ( 3) Doctors regularly advise heart patients to avoid confined smoky areas because coronary attacks might be triggered by the lack of clean air. (4) Moreover, having the smell of smoke in one’s hair and clothes is a real nuisance. ( 5) Even if a person is without any health problems, exhaled smoke doubles the amount of carbon monoxide in the air, a condition that may cause lung prob- lems in the future. Sentence 4 refers to smoke as a nuisance and therefore does not belong in a paragraph that discusses smoking as a health hazard to nonsmokers. Sometimes a large portion of a paragraph will drift into another topic. In the paragraph below, did the writer wish to focus on her messiness or on the beneficial effects of her engagement? I have always been a very messy person. As a child, I was a pack rat, saving every little piece of insignificant paper that I thought might be important when I grew up. As a teenager, my pockets bulged with remnants of basketball tickets, hall passes, gum wrappers, and other important ar- ticles from my high school education. As a college student, I became a boxer—not a fighter, but someone who cannot throw anything away and therefore it winds up in a box in my closet. But my engagement has changed everything. I’m really pleased with the new stage of my life, and I owe it all to my fiancé. My overall outlook on life has changed be- cause of his influence on me. I’m neater, much more cheer- Note shift from the topic of messiness ful, and I’m even getting places on time like I never did before. It’s truly amazing what love can do. This writer may wish to discuss the changes her fiancé has inspired and then use her former messiness, tardiness, and other bad habits as examples illus- trating those changes; however, as presented here, the paragraph is not uni- fied around a central idea. On the contrary, it first seems to promise a discussion of her messiness but then wanders into comments on “what love can do.” Also ...